Banning the Blahs: A Drama in Three Acts Print



Act 1

(Woman stomps into room where Man is watching television)


Woman: I am SO bored! There is ABSOLUTELY nothing to do in this ONE HORSE TOWN. If I have to watch one more cruddy television show or another ball game, I am going to LOSE MY MIND! We have to GET OUT!


(Woman leaves room; Man places head in hands; as voice-over continues, dollar signs with wings fly out of Man's pocket)

Tragic words, indeed, and spoken all too often, especially during the long, dreary months of winter. Words that strike terror into the hearts of parents and spouses because they are usually followed by....a trip to Amarillo (cash register sound)....and a couple of meals (two cash register sounds)....and a visit to the Mall (three cash register sounds)....and then whatever event you planned to see, all followed by the long drive home, a short night, and waking up to all the chores that were postponed because of the trip.


If only there were another way that the small town blahs could be dispatched....


(Fade to black)

Act 2

(Man and woman sit at table, listlessly opening mail; Man opens brochure and smiles)


Man: Oh, I say, darling, look at this! Those wonderful folks on the School Board and our friends on the board of the Canadian Arts Alliance have teamed up to rid Canadian of the small town blahs.


Woman: Whatever do you mean, dear?


Man: It says here that the old school auditorium has been remodeled—new sound, new seats, new lights, the works. It even has a new name: Texas Crown Performance Hall. And the Arts Alliance folks are lining up all sorts of shows to bring to Canadian.


Woman: Oh, sure: Cousin Lester and his dancing rooster, I'll wager.


Man: Let's see. Matt Martindale, the Nitty Gritty Dirt Band, a Broadway Touring Show, Blue Grass, opera....why there is even a children's drama camp. But, no, I don't see Cousin Lester or his rooster mentioned.


(Man and Woman continue to read brochure; fade to black)

Act 3

Woman: Hearing about the Texas Crown is great news. It has the same type of shows we like to see in Amarillo.


Man: Yes, and we save on time, gas, and money. Why, I'll be able to clean the garage, paint the bedroom, and still have time to see the new show.


Woman: And all of our friends will be there, too! Hello, Texas Crown and goodbye, small town blahs. Gosh, I wish there were some way we could help those wonderful folks at the Arts Alliance....


Man: But there is. (Points to brochure) It says we can help by becoming volunteers, by joining the Arts Alliance, or by sponsoring shows. Golly, they all sound just swell; I don't know which one to choose.


Woman: (Laughs) We don't have to choose just one; we can do them all! I'll go get the checkbook while you start filling out the volunteer form. Then we'll decide what show to sponsor. Oh, I feel so much better, and all thanks to the Canadian Arts Alliance and the Texas Crown!


(Fades to black)


Our play ends here, but the work of the Canadian Arts Alliance has only begun.  We now have a facility that is second to none for towns our size. We have a dedicated board that is eager to work. We have ideas running out our ears.


What we don't have is adequate funding. (You knew that was coming.) Non-profit theaters like the Texas Crown depend on membership fees and sponsors to make it possible to have high quality programming while maintaining reasonable ticket prices. That is the only way it can work.


The Arts Alliance has only two goals: to enrich the educational experience of our children and to provide high quality entertainment for the wider community.


If you wish to help us achieve these goals, you will do three things:

-fill out and submit the membership form

-complete the volunteer form on our website (

-seriously consider underwriting a show, either in part or in total


Online you will find our 2010 schedule. It may get bigger or it may get smaller; the choice is yours. Questions, comments, or suggestions may be directed to any member of the board or to me. I can be reached at 323.2567.


Dramatically yours,

John McGarr